Friday, July 07, 2006

The Week in Review: Vince Foster Edition

Given the events of this week, I can't help but wonder where are all the "Hilary Killed Vince Foster" and "Clinton Body Count" conspiracy theorists now?

First, last Sunday, Abu Musab al-Zarqawi's widow claimed her husband was killed as part of a deal where the "Americans agreed to slow down their search for bin Laden".

Then a couple of days later we learned that the CIA has closed its Osama unit.

hmmm...

Then Wednesday, Enron founder, Kenneth Lay, was found dead of an apparent heart attack despite being in otherwise good health. If a close friend of President Clinton had died under similar circumstances, you can bet the Clinton conspiracy theorists would be out in force.

To be fair, I have heard a few people question whether President Bush had Ken Lay killed, but I don't think the President would murder a close friend. (He's willing to kill thousands of strangers in an illegal war, but I doubt he would kill a close friend.)

It's far more likely he helped Kenny Boy fake his own death and escape to a life of luxury in South America. Especially since his "death" apparently erases his convictions and stops the feds from seizing the assets in his estate.

Today, Lay's family announced his desire to be cremated with his ashes hidden in an offshore bank account buried in Colorado.

Anyone else think that there won't be an open casket for the funeral?

Meanwhile, reports that "part of [Mrs. Lay's] grieving process is to pack up all his belongs in suitcases and research exotic island in Greece" are unconfirmed.

hmmm...

Finally, there is this report that Former Secretary of State Colin Powell was hospitalized in Aspen at the very same hospital where Ken Lay was pronounced dead on Wednesday. Powell became ill after dining with none other than the original conspirator himself, former President Bill Clinton.

hmmm...


UPDATE:

I almost forgot, do you remember where President Bush spent last weekend? I wonder what advice he received while visiting Elvis Presley's Graceland home in Memphis?

hmmm...

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